I realized that the fallout from Matt had me untrusting everyone. People I’ve known for years. I just so happened to start talking to someone I’ve Loved for a long time, my old friend Sebastian. I met him when will you before I met my ex-husband. I mean him and I got along really well, the chemistry is amazing, and I always love him, he is a wonderful person. at that point in time I was a huge low, I was crying my eyes out, I couldn’t really get out of bed. My mom had just died, Matt had just abandoned me, and I wasn’t able to function. Sebastian had gotten married a few years ago, around the time that I married David. We haven’t talked since then. I just was lonely, and I saw that he had written me a few years ago and I missed it on hangouts. So I checked in with him I asked how he was, if he was happy in what was going on. first he said he was totally fine, then he admitted that he was miserable in his marriage. He went on to describe a verbally abusive and narcissistic relationship, that I recognize extremely well, because I went through it, and I’ve studied it for years. I just started asking him questions, trying to get him to see outside of what he was in. Questions like, are you happy, what do you want out of relationship, do you wanna be treated like that, do you think anyone deserves to be treated like that, that kind of thing. It’s a technique I’ve developed instead if advice, especially in an abusive relationship, as the victim often us made to feel crazy, and question their judgment. I’ve lived this.
Anyway I reminded him how amazing he is, sent him some articles about what he’s going through, let him know he wasn’t alone, I’ve been there, abd I’ll be there for him.
He wanted to talk to me about what I’ve been through and I told him pretty much everything, especially about Matt which what I was agonizing over. I was all alone, my mom just died, and there was no one there for me to talk to you. I mean people were reaching out, but I am having a really hard time trusting anyone due to losing trust from the aftermath of what happened with Matt. I told him everything, he said he wanted to be there for me, which scared me because that’s also what Matt said.
I told him that I loved him and I was there for him, because I do, not just as a friend, like I love everyone else, but he’s like the one that got away, to me. We almost got together, but just stayed friends. He was very special to me so I really really liked him and I loved him as a friend.
Inspiration 